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Many people feel as though church services were ‘just for them’ or ‘pastor was speaking to me this morning!’. 

I feel as though many people can feel that way, because it is all in how we take things and how we listen to the service.

This morning in church, pastor was talking about how this is not my house, it is the Lord’s house. (my actual home, not talking about the church) and how he opens his doors to many people (to stay there for a period of time) because it isn’t his house, it is the Lord’s house.  Well, that is kind of how I felt about my ex-bf.  I was talking to my mom the other day and I told her that even if my ex’bf and I were just friends at the time he moved in, I would have let him move into the spare bedroom because he was in the process of loosing the place he was staying in.  I would have let him live there rent free until he got a job and then I would expect a contribution….that is what took place.  When he got a promotion….he started contributing more…and that is what I would have expected even if we were just friends.  Now he is doing quite well and is able to get a place of his own….and that is what he did. 

Deep down inside of me, I always feared that he would not stay with me once he got back on his feet. 

Don’t get me wrong, I am glad we aren’t together anymore, however, the day dreaming I did of the life I thought we were going to live together was awesome.  The only thing I miss is the thing that I never had.